Thursday, February 12, 2009

It's Not Just a Damn Wig--It's a Stunning Wig, Motherfuckers!

Can't you just hear Samuel Jackson yelling: IT'S A STUNNING WIG, MOTHERFUCKERS!? Everything always sounds better when Samuel Jackson says it, and you know it.

I think I've found my dream wig, people (see glorious photo of extreme loveliness above)! I have always wanted long, Rapunzel-like hair. This is the shit SB SHOULD HAVE BEEN BORN WITH if God was more of a stylist.

Anyhoo, the description calls it a STUNNING WIG in all caps. It's like Kanye West wrote the damn wig descriptions. He always blogs in ALL CAPS WITH ABOUT 1,000 DAMN EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What do you think of the STUNNING WIG? I could sleep in even later each morning because I wouldn't have to wash my hair all that often. As a result of this, I could go back to brushing my teeth and still make it to work on time. My co-workers might even take up a collection to buy the STUNNING WIG for me so they don't have to deal with my breath anymore.

BONUS! I could style the wig into an updo for Cousin Sheila's impending nuptials. I told her the only thing I refused to do for her on her Day of Joy was to get a damn updo. I might change my mind if Sheila purchases the STUNNING WIG for me. She's going to be a damn doctor. She can afford it!

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